Free Standing Shelving

Am I been selfish or my brother?

I live with my Mum, Brother, Step dad and Grandad. I have the smallest room, but it is still a good size. I want to swap rooms with my little brother who is eight as I don't have enough room. My mum suggested it and I agreed but my brother doesn't want to and threw a tantrum over it. However, I have an easel, single bed, 1 big and small wardrobe, a shelving unit for my tv and draws x2. So it can fit alot but my room is fairly cramped. Plus I am 17 and my bf stays over on weekends and in the holidays but I only have a single bed because I don't have room for a double. Plus my room is above my Gran dad's, and as I stay up late I wake him up. I also want a wooden floor as I am an art student and always get my carpet dirty, my brothers room has one. It would be great if we could swap rooms as his is quite a bit bigger and he has lots of left over space so he could fit in my room. But he's upset and says he doesn't want too so I feel guilty. My Step Dad is building him a play room so he will have 2 bedrooms either way. Am I been selfish for making him change bredroom or is he been selfish as I need the space more than him?

Public Comments

1. Your 17 and you have alot of focused on you. What is your brother 8??! 8 year old don't have alot of objects/worries on them. So I think it's fair enough to swap rooms with him, plus your mother is the householder so she makes the decisions, don't worry about a pre-teen.
2. It isn't really your brothers choice... If your mom & you agreed then swap rooms.
3. I don't think you are being selfish at all.. Your brother will have a chance at any room in the house when you move out..... It is up to your parents to tell him what is going to be done, it is their decision, not your little brothers.
4. Look, none of u are selfish here,, its a natural thing for ur brother to say no ,because where we stay for long time ,we start liking that place isnt it, and if we are suddenly asked to vacate it ,it does hurt.. and u are also not wrong on ur side ,because u require a may be bit bigger room and as u say one with wooden floor,,,,,so its ur requirement.. but i guess u have a seperate room and it shld make u happy,, well if u think u make floor dirty ,put big cloth on floor every time u paint or watever art u do,,, , but theres no need to feel guilty, none of u are wrong. i guess if urgently required ,may be u can ask ur brother to share room for some time ,,when required to u,,,, and other time u can be in ur own rooms,... but dnt force him,coz hes smalll and is bound to feel bad.
5. Dont feel guilty, the reality is he is 8 and eigth year olds can get used to getting their own way, life will teach us eventually that we have lessons to learn, children soon have to learn: 1) They are not the centre of attention, the family is a unit. 2) They have to share. 3) They will have to compromise for the good of the unit. These are but a few of the lessons and the younger a child learns these the less they suffer when older, for example, you are considering that you are being unfair, you wouldn't know about this self assessment if you hadn't, at some time in your life, had to learn compassion and thinking of others. It is a noble quality, but it is also noble to help other people to learn and grow. In the end, in less than a day after moving in, he will get started setting his new world and forget all about it, young children assimilate lessons quicker than we think. You are 17 and need more room, it is practical and also fair, he will throw tantrums, but once he has learnt that he is not the only child, he will move on, in the end you will be doing him a favour and teaching him one of lifes lessons. When my son was 5 i was in Uni and had to drop him off at 8am in the University playu centre when attending my classes, he screamed, pulled, threw a tantrum etc, for three days i thought about how much a bad dad i was, i almost left university to be a better 'father', the child minder told me on the Thursday to drop him off, go and come back only 5 minutes later, sure enough, screams tantrums and me with broken heart. 5 minutes later i returned to see him playing, laughing and having fun..... little monster!!!! I never worried again and he learnt a lesson. Don't worry, we have all had to learn how to work with tantrums. Move as you are older, an adult teenager and are in need of it more. Karl